TOKYO – Executives for Nintendo could hardly find time away from the flood of enthusiastic phone calls, emails, and sky writing to announce Yankee catcher Sal Fasano as cover star for their highly anticipated video game, Super Mario Brothers ’07.
Super Mario Brothers ’07 cover star, Sal Fasano (left), relishing his new role.
"Sal was our guy from day one," said Nintendo bigwig Mitsubishi Kawasakio through his translator. "I mean, how can he not be our guy? Sal has a ridiculous mustache, so does Mario. Sal looooves pizza, so does Mario. They found each other really, we just drew up the paperwork."
Fasano, who when reached for comment was finishing up an innovative and somewhat ambitious ‘sign my pizza slice’ autograph party in the Bronx following Thursday’s game, seems unfazed by the Super Mario Bros cover curse — which most recently ruined the career of Stan Van Gundy.
"I remember playing the video game when I was younger, and I always thought those red overalls with the blue shirt looked so comfortable, you know, instead of this catcher’s gear I have to wear every day," explained Fasano who had just funneled 3 hippie rolls and a slice of sicilian to the delight of the packed pizza parlor. "This crap is a pain in the (expletive) to get on and off. But I already talked to the photographer and he said I can keep the gear from the shoot, so at least on my off days I can wear it around the house or when I have to run errands."
Despite a well-documented history of brutal cover curses in popular games like Madden football, Fasano’s loyal fan base pushed forward on a desperate quest to make him the Mario cover boy. Some dedicated Fans had even gone as far as asking producers of the 1993 Hollywood disaster ‘Super Mario Brothers’ to digitally replace actor Bob Hoskins, who played Mario, with cult hero Fasano.
"We have not yet decided what we’re doing for the collectors edition DVD of ‘Super Mario Brothers’," said a representative from RidiculousMustache Studios. "But we heard about the cover and we’re delighted for Mr. Fasano."